


You're Always with Me.

by lilhunnybee



Category: Original Work
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Original Character Death(s), Original Character(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-25
Updated: 2020-09-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:20:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26644387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilhunnybee/pseuds/lilhunnybee
Summary: William remembers an old song his mom once sang to him. With his son in need of consoling, he decides to put it to his advantage...
Relationships: Howard Elston/William Elston
Kudos: 1





	You're Always with Me.

**Author's Note:**

> Credit goes to the show 'Infinity Train' for 'Tuba's Song,' which is used several times in this story.   
> https://youtu.be/CkfB9_gWYkY
> 
> A special thanks goes to a friend of mine that gave me inspiration for the premise of all this.
> 
> This is my first time posting here so I apologize in advance if there are a few mistakes/difficulties reading.
> 
> Enjoy!

**7/13/2005**

_The world around us is devoid of light,_   
_darkness covering it by every corner._

_As I search for a way out of the endless void,_  
 _your own light shines through_ _to guide me home._

 _The sky may be angry at us_ _and the wind might never stop howling._  
 _To you, none of that matters because_ _you're always with me._  


Thunder rumbled across the rain swept neighborhood below, flashes of lightning casting scars against the clouded sky. The night stars had been hidden behind a large sheet of dark grey clouds that hung menacingly over the town below. 

During the months of summer it was hard to believe weather such as this could suddenly appear. It was also relatively uncommon to have thunderstorms sweep through this small town. The temperature was usually unsuitable for that type of weather to form. However, much to the neighborhood's surprise, a thunderstorm had unexpectedly broke over the once clear sky. People were now hurrying back to the safety of their homes. Much to one particular man's fortune, he had already been tucked away in his house before the storm began. The only thing is, he wasn't the only one living there... and his companion was very unhappy. 

Inside of a small yet cozy little home sat a fairly tall man with ruffled cinnamon brown hair. His pale skin would have freckles heavily plastered upon his face & arms, his peachy lips also curved into a frown. He sat upon a comfy looking sofa in his living room, a warm orange glow radiating off of the fire he recently lit. This man went by the name of William, and he was currently in a bit of a predicament. His hazel eyes were rounded with concern as he was hunched over, peering down at a little shape he held in his arms. It was his one year old son Matthew, who had been napping before thunder came echoing across the neighborhood. Originally William had planned to cook dinner but his son's sudden shrieking made him immediately change his mind. Now he was laying in William's arms with his cheeks stained with tears as he let out a frightened wail. While the lightning & thunder were gradually lessening over time, that wouldn't put an end to Matthew's nonstop crying. 

William had spent a whole hour trying his best to soothe his weeping son. He had removed him from his crib & brought him out near the fireplace, hoping the view of the flames would distract him. It didn't work. He had rocked him back & forth while gently shushing him. That didn't work either. He tried distracting him with his favorite kitty toy, and he had wrapped him up in plentiful soft blankets and so on. Yet none of them succeeded in stopping his cries.The older figure leaned back for a moment, heaving out a tired sigh. He and his son weren't the only ones living there. William was a married man, but his other half was nowhere to be found. He would've loved to have his husband Howard come over to assist him right now. Unfortunately he was out working & was heading home the moment the storm arrived. He later received a phone call from him explaining he'd be gone for a while. The rain outdoors was pouring hard, and people in their vehicles were clearly eager to escape the rain. With all the cars moving about, traffic had started to form... thus leaving William to deal with his doleful son by himself.

Matthew let out another ear piercing shriek, quickly snapping him out of his thoughts. He held back the urge to cover his ears as he'd desperately continue rocking him, hoping the movement will distract him. Much to his disappointment (but not to his surprise), it didn't work. Combined with his lack of sleep & being startled awake, William understood why Matthew was especially crabby. That didn't make his situation any less difficult though. By now his neighbors were likely able to hear his crying, which only made William more desperate to end this once and for all. While his son continued to cry & wail in his arms, William dissociated himself from the loud noises & his surroundings to focus. What _could_ he do? He had already done everything at the top of his head he knew could calm his baby boy down. 

His brows furrowed as he thought deeply to himself, searching through his memories in hopes of finding something that could assist him in his current situation. A particular part of his past had returned to his mind which brought him an idea.During his early childhood days, he had vague memories of his mother Maria singing him a song to brighten his spirits. She had sang it to him when he was a baby to a small toddler. It turned out he was also quite the fussy little one, so she sang it to him often to soothe him. William had tried humming a tune to Matthew as well, but perhaps the song she sang to him would be more effective? Although his relationship with his mother was certainly more complicated now, that wouldn't stop him from using the song she formerly sang to him. 

Returning to the present, William would glance down at Matthew once more. Unsurprisingly he was still crying, but it was clear he was beginning to get tuckered out. Between his wails he'd heave out an occasional yawn, his eyes struggling to stay open as more tears fell out of them. _'Perfect timing'_ William thought with relief. If his idea would work, then it should hopefully lure his son back into a soundless slumber. After memorizing the lyrics in his head, William would shift in his position & hold Matthew closer to him. As his cries continued to carry across the room, William would raise his voice over him & slowly begin to sing. 

_"Don't be a worry baby,"_

His son would look up to him, his lips quivering as tears still poured from his eyes. The occasional hiccup would still slip from his mouth, but he was beginning to quiet down and listen.

_"No need to hurry baby_  
 _when you're with me."_

Slowly he'd begin rocking Matthew in his arms, keeping a firm hold onto his blanket covered body. Thunder rumbled overhead, but he was too distracted by William's voice to react.

_"Don't run way up ahead,_  
 _take the long way instead..._  
 _there's lots to see."_

At this point Matthew had gone completely silent, only looking up at his father with watery eyes. William passed him a warm smile as he continued.

"When you slow down and listen, then you won't go a-missin' chances to play."

While singing with a chipper tone, he'd set Matthew onto his lap & move out a spare hand to 'boop' him on the nose. The frown that had been carved onto Matthew's face the past hour was replaced by a drowsy grin. 

_"We'll always have tomorrow,_  
 _no need to let it borrow time_  
 _from today,_  
 _so don't be a worry baby,_  
 _no need to hurry baby,"_

Matthew's smile would disappear as he'd heave out another yawn. William would set him in both his arms again to hold him close to his chest.

_"When you're with me,_  
 _just take it easy-peasy,_  
 _my little lemon squeezy..."_

His son had eventually laid his head against him, his once tear filled eyes shut tightly as he began drifting off to sleep. William bit back a yawn as he laid back on the sofa, closing his eyes as he uttered the final lyrics. 

_"You're always with me."_

* * *

**9/7/2009**

  
_The land around us is starting to change,_   
_giving us omens of the upcoming season._   
_I begin to change with it, my body_   
_as vibrant as the leaves themselves._

  
_As I grow old, I will remind myself of this._

  
_Leaves abandon their branches by the coming winter._  
 _I am a leaf, waiting for my winter to come so_ _I can follow the wind._  
 _As winter's breeze begins to take hold of me_  
 _I will remember no matter how far I go,_ _you're always with me._  


Sunlight broke through the rolling hills, casting a bright glow upon the waking town below. Bird song drifted along with the passing winds, carrying a fine tune for the folk now beginning to start their day. The sun's warm rays would quickly weaken over time, the crisp autumn air already growing noticeable as summer took its leave. 

It was now the month of September, and families were now preparing to send their children off to their schools. Today was a special day for William in particular since this was the first time he'd ever get to do so. 

Four years have passed and his son Matthew was now at the age of five. He felt astounded at how quickly his son had grown and couldn't help but feel incredibly prideful over him. Despite his young age, he was a quick learner & usually well behaved. This came as a surprise to William since he suspected he'd be more rumbustious. He was also relieved over this since his personality would suit well to his new kindergarten teacher.

Speaking of kindergarten... he had finally managed to find a suitable one for him to go to. He'd spent the last months of summer searching for one before remembering one of his friends were specialized in teaching young children. She went by the name of Ms. Judy. She was always sweet & patient girl around him and children, so he was sure she could be trusted to watch over his son. She was glad to assist him in getting Matthew into the right learning environment and will soon meet him later today. As exciting as it all was, William was also quick to notice Matthew's growing anxiety as August was nearing to an end. Although he'd been quiet on the subject on going to kindergarten, William suspected that he wasn't all too eager to go. He has shown himself to be to be more of a shy kid, so he doubted he was eager to enter a classroom full of louder, energetic children. He only hoped that he would change his tune over time and manage to gain a few friends along the way. 

After getting himself neat & ready for the day, William would slowly crack open his son's door, peering in to check if he was awake. Matthew was seated on the side of his bed while staring down at what he assumed was his kitty plush held in his palms. Now that he was older, black, silky hair had grown over his originally bald head. Freckles had also began to make their way across Matthew's face, popping out vividly from his cute little face. 'Just like Howard' William thought fondly when he first saw Matthew's hair & freckles showing up. Both of them shared similar personality types and appearances. He could already see some of his husband's spirit inside of him, physically and mentally, which he hoped would fester inside of him for the rest of his days.

Knowing his son was out of bed, William would then open the door and let his presence be known. _"Rise and shine, buttercup!"_ He beamed down at Matthew, whom slowly turned his head to look at him. _"Today's yer' first day of_ _kindergarten-"_ He'd continue while noticing his son was still in his pajamas, _"-so you'd better get dressed and brush yer' teeth!"_ Matthew only stared at him, and for a moment William caught a brief moment of panic flickering over his expression. Before he could ask what was wrong, Matthew would let out a half hearted 'okay' and remove himself from his bed &the room itself. William would arch a brow as soon as his son left his sight. It was still early in the morning, so he guessed Matthew just felt a little off from waking up so soon. With his son busy brushing his teeth in the nearby restroom, William took the time to fix his son's bed, set out his school clothes onto the sheets and grab his backpack. With Matthew's school supplies already tucked safe and sound in with his backpack, all he needed to do now was wait for Matthew to come back. Briefly William would check his watch as Matthew left to the restroom. 

_'Oh golly.'_ He tried not to let his concern crack over his face as he inspected the current time. They only had thirteen minutes left before Matthew's class would begin. That and Matthew was taking a longer time than he usually did in the restroom. He wasn't sure if this was intentional or not, but either way, time was passing quickly. His worries ebbed away slightly as he heard Matthew's footsteps finally approaching. His son sluggishly returned to his bedroom, his feet dragging carelessly against the floor. He stood there awkwardly, his head tilting to look up at his father. _"Come on now, Matthew- we've gotta hurry, go put on yer' clothes and grab yer' backpack."_ William said, gesturing over to the outfit that was laid upon his bed sheets.

 _"But-"_ Matthew spoke up, hesitating as William's gaze landed back onto him. After a moment of an uncomfortable silence, he'd continue. _"-I don't want to go..."_

William bit back a sigh as soon as he heard those words escape from Matthew's mouth. He had dreaded the possibility he'd argue against going, and now it seemed that they may be going down that route. With the clock ticking, he most certainly wouldn't tolerate it. Quickly William would respond, keeping his tone fairly stern _"I understand that you're nervous Matthew, but you need to go- Ms. Judy will be happy to help you if you're havin' any trouble in class."_ Matthew shifted nervously in his spot, the frown on his face deepening before eventually speaking up again. _"What if the other kids don't like me?"_ He'd squeak out, fiddling with his fingers nervously while averting his eyes from his father. William leaned down slightly, resting his hand on his knee while using the other one to ruffle Matthew's hair. _"I'm sure they'll like you just fine,"_ He said with a smile, _"you just gotta remember to behave nicely and be polite."_

The young boy would pause for a moment, uncertainty still present upon his face. _"...I don't want you to leave me there, though... why cant you stay with me?"_ Tears were beginning to prick at the edges of Matthew's eyes, his lips also beginning to quiver. _"I don't **want** to be alone!"_ Matthew exclaimed before William had time to speak up, tears now making way down his cheeks. This certainly wouldn't do. He wanted Matthew to experience his first day of kindergarten with a smile. William stood there for a moment, Matthew's sniffling filling his ears as he thought of a way to calm him down. After a moment of thinking an idea suddenly came to William's mind. He used it a few times before and it always ended up successful. He'd slowly reach out and wrap his arms around Matthew, pulling him into a gentle hug while peacefully singing:

_"Don't be a worry baby,_  
 _no need to hurry, baby,_  
 _when you're with me,_  
 _don't run way up ahead..."_

A few muffled hiccups emerged from Matthew whom hid his tear stained face in William's shoulder. His clothes were likely getting wet with his tears, but William didn't mind at the moment.

" _...take the long way instead,_  
 _there's lots to see_  
 _when you slow down and listen,_  
 _then you wont go a'missin'_  
 _chances to play,"_

The pitiful noises coming from Matthew had come to a halt, the only noises emitted from him being his shaky breathing. William lightly rubbed his back with a spare palm, his voice still carrying into his ears.

_"We'll always have tomorrow,_  
 _no need to let it borrow time_  
 _from today,_  
 _so don't be a worry baby,_  
 _no need to hurry baby,"_

Carefully William would pull away from Matthew, meeting his tearful gaze while reaching out to hold his small hands in his larger palms. 

_"When you're with me_  
 _just take it easy-peasy,_  
 _my little lemon squeezy,_  
 _you're always with me."_

Matthew would abruptly pull away, his distress quickly returning as he'd stutter _"B-But that's not true- I can't be with you when I'm at kindergarten!"_

William would pause before placing his palm onto his child's chest.

 _"Even if ya' think I won't be with you,"_ He began slowly _"I'll always be right here."_

Matthew looked down at William's hand for a moment, confusion replacing his fretful expression. _"You're going to be on my chest?"_ He asked hesitantly, glancing back at his father with wide eyes. His father would let out a hearty chuckle, slowly pulling his hand away. _"No no, silly..."_ He murmured, an amused grin escaping from him _"What I meant was- even if I'm not at the kindergarten with you, I'll always still be with you in your heart."_ His son stopped for a moment to ponder over this, looking down at his chest & back at his father. _"Will I be in there with you too?"_ He'd ask slowly, standing on his toes to point at William's own chest. The man would smile and nod, bending back down to ruffle his black hair. _"Of course ya' will,"_ William told him with a gentle smile "you'll always be in my heart. Will you promise to do the same with me?" A smile returned to Matthew's face as he eagerly nodded. Relieved to know his son was returning to his chipper self, William would step back & pull out his son's clothes. _"Come on now- we've still only got a few minutes left before your class starts!"_

Thankfully the drive there hadn't been as long as William dreaded it to be. The two had successfully managed to arrive before Ms.Judy started her class. Matthew's classroom was bright and colorful, toys and school supplies neatly organized and waiting to be put into good use. Other children had arrived earlier to the area, their excited chattering & laughter filling the room. William was standing by the classroom's entrance, exchanging a conversation with Matthew's teacher. Meanwhile, his son stood close by his father's legs, hiding behind them as he stared anxiously into the busy classroom. After giving each other a few final words, Ms. Judy would suddenly lean down & beam down at him. _"Why hello there,_ _Matthew!"_ She'd greet him with a pleasant smile. Matthew would jump slightly & respond back meekly _"Um... hello."_ He'd awkwardly look down at his feet, unable to meet eye contact with his new teacher. Ms.Judy paid no mind to this, her tone still chipper as she'd continue _"I've heard a lot about you from your dad-"_ Matthew lifted his head slightly _"-you're a very smart boy, so I'm sure the other kids could use your help from time to time."_

Ms. Judy's compliment definitely helped Matthew brighten up as he let out a little smile. She'd then step aside, pointing to where the other students have left their backpacks at. " _Before class starts, you have your own cubby which you can_  
 _put your stuff in... follow me and I'll show you!"_

His son took a few steps forward, following his teacher before casting a worried glance back to William. His father would smile and place his hand over his heart, giving him an encouraging reminder before he left:

_"You're always with me."_

* * *

  
**12/5/2009**

  
_The terrain grows colder and so does its people,_   
_their words like icicles piercing my heart._

_I am as bare as the trees left to suffer without its leaves,_   
_my emotions exposed for all to see._

  
_My vision is blinded by the endless falling snow,_ _making me forget that I am not alone._  
 _Then your light shines upon me,_ _melting the snow that blindfolded me._  
 _As I make my way through the icy paths,_ _you're always with me._

The howling of the wind surrounded the wintry air, snowflakes whirring across the frosty town & landing upon the endless snow. Trees' branches swayed uneasily against the harsh blasts of wind, the little foliage left on the ground being   
covered in blankets of white. 

Winter had quickly swept in, stripping the trees bare of their leaves & smothering the land with ice and snow. The cold weather had been relatively peaceful up until now, the cruel winds of a passing blizzard now entering the town below. Few people lingered outdoors, desperately making their way through the snow to return to the safety of their homes. One of those people being William, whom was only trying to get back home after his doctor's appointment. If he had known a blizzard would come later that day, then he simply would've stayed home & saved it for another time. Yet here he was now, struggling not to slip against the icy cement & shivering like mad. His brown hair would be speckled with snowflakes that fell upon him, along with his face flushing from his winter surroundings. His hazel eyes squinted as he tried to peer past the snowflakes flooding his vision. He held his hand above his eyes as he scanned the desolate streets until he finally spotted what he'd been looking for. Breathing a sigh of relief, William would quicken his pace as he made way back to his house. 

A creak rang through the building as William opened the front door, a few snowflakes landing onto the wooden floor. Quickly he'd shut it behind him, not wanting the cold air to escape into the house. Swiftly he'd remove his jacket from his body & leave it onto a nearby coat hanger, along with swinging his scarf onto his arm. He'd let out another sigh, but sounding much more tired than the last. His appointment had gone relatively well- he was mostly relieved at the tests not taking too long. Winter break hadn't arrived just yet, so his son still had to deal with school- usually he was the one to come pick him up & help with homework, but now that had changed. A certain incident had occurred during October that transpired in him landing into the hospital. Thankfully he had recovered quickly, and was free to wander out on his own now. He still needed to take the occasional checkup & receive medication, is all. Howard then had to take over the duties usually he would've done himself. William felt quite guilty about it, but Howard insisted that it was alright. Aside from that, the results he'd gotten from his most recent tests were... concerning. He wouldn't think any further of it though. What really worried him is how he would tell his husband whose presence was just around the corner.

The sound of Howard's footsteps would come to a halt, William needing to lift his head slightly to meet him in the eye. Howard stood over him like a tower, his skin being a much darker shade & freckles plastered faintly over his cheeks. He was also abnormally tall & well built, making William feel like an ant despite being a bit tall himself. His inner thoughts would come to a halt as Howard stepped forward & brushed the remaining snow off his hair. Embarrassed at how quiet he'd been the past moment, William would snap out of it & speak. _"Good afternoon sweetheart."_ he'd greet him while passing him a wary smile. Internally he'd pray that Howard wouldn't ask him about the news he received during his time at the clinic. Howard was already what he'd describe as a 'worry-wart,' so he'd rather not trouble him further with his health. If anything, all that he really wanted to do was just have a regular conversation. The two barely had a chance to speak casually to each other since William was usually forced to sleep or was groggy due to medication. Speaking of medication... he'd have to take some later, which William didn't look forward to. Decidedly he'd just distract himself from it for now, since he had a few things he needed to check on beforehand. William would inspect the nearby windows & grimace at the frost climbing over the glass. It didn't appear the blizzard was taking its leave anytime soon. _"The weather out there is_ _horrendous- is Matthew still in school?"_ He'd ask anxiously. If Matthew was still out there, by now he'd certainly be a statue of ice. Howard would shake his head, lifting his large hands to start signing: _'Thankfully no, I got him out of there before the blizzard hit.'_

His husband isn't deaf nor is incapable of verbal speech, there were just times were he preferred to be mute. Judging by the faint shadows beneath Howard's eyes, he guessed he was too tired to use his vocal cords that day. He was also relieved at the news, William couldn't help but notice the house felt considerably colder than when he first left. He would've liked to ask more about their son, but he'd have to hold the questions back for now. _"Say, do we have any fire wood left?"_ He'd ask while momentarily setting his scarf aside with his jacket _"I think I already feel a chill startin' to form in here."_ He'd hum out worriedly, suppressing a shiver due to the cool air surrounding the room. Howard nodded, signing again before grabbing a large wooden plank that'd been left by the fireplace. _'I was going to heat the house up until I heard you come in,'_ His brows furrowed for a moment _'I was concerned over you getting trapped in that snowstorm.'_ William tenderly smiled and gave him a light pat on the shoulder. _"I'm back home now, and all ya' really have to worry about now is the fact I've got a cold comin' my way."_ Right as he finished talking, he'd hide his face in his arm to let out a  
high pitched sneeze.

Before Howard got the chance to fuss over him, a muffled noise emerged from one of the other rooms. Or more specifically, their son's room. William quickly removed his face from his arm as he stared to the direction of Matthew's room. Howard would throw the last of the wood into the fireplace before standing beside him. His husband was silent, but he sensed he was equally as worried. _"Is Matthew..."_ William frowned, listening harder to discover that his son was indeed,crying. Howard would let out a quiet grunt, rubbing his head before turning back to him. _'I think he had a rough day at school,'_ He'd raise his hands & gestured with them slowly ' _I tried to comfort him earlier, but nothing I did made him_ _feel any better.'_ The guilty expression Howard held encouraged William to place his hand back on his shoulder. _"Ya' did the best you could,"_ He'd say reassuringly before looking back to where Matthew's room was _"how about I go help him while you finish creating the fire?"_ Howard's frown wouldn't leave, indicating he wasn't very fond of that idea. Knowing why that was, William would let out a soft chuckle & take a small step away. _"Dont you worry none,_ _sweetpea. I'll be sure ta' get some rest when I'm finished."_ His husband seemed skeptical until William stood up on his toes to peck him on the cheek. _"Worry about keeping the house warm instead o' me."_ He'd lean in and murmur to him before giving Howard some space. His husband didn't even have time to react as he quickly added, _"Oh, and make sure to get some sleep later or else I'll drag ya' right into bed."_ Howard stood for a moment, rather dumbfounded until he set off to find his lighter. With his husband occupied with his own duties,, William would already be approaching Matthew's door. He stood outside of it quietly, not even having to press his ear against the door to hear the sobbing.

Carefully the man would knock on his door loudly enough to catch his attention. He'd clear his throat before speaking up, "Hey buttercup?" He kept his tone peaceful to hide the concern underlying him "Can I come in?" Nothing was said from Matthew as William fell into silence. Staring fretfully at the door, William would wait a minute or so in hopes of Matthew saying something to him. Yet just as before, he wouldn't utter a single thing. Hesitantly he'd place his hand over the doorknob. Perhaps he didn't hear what his son had said? Either way, he couldn't hold the willpower to stay out any longer. Cautiously William would open the door, poking his head in to check where Matthew was. He'd notice his body laying on his bed, curled up slightly as he laid his arms & head on his pillow. William took a few steps forward, looking down at him anxiously. He recalled Howard telling him he didn't have the best school day, which only made him yearn for his winter break to come sooner. It'd make all of their lives much easier. 

His son was seven years old now, soon to be eight by a few months. Long since it'd been his kindergarten days, now he was climbing up to bigger grades and getting smarter by the passing years. He was in the second grade now, but with winter going by school was bound to end soon after. He usually received good grades, but nowadays his scores had been plummeting. Not that he blamed him for that, Matthew had vented to him in the past about how lonely he was, and how his 'friends' would later ditch him for nonsensical reasons. Of course, all of that brought him to feel miserable, thus leaving him where he was today. Letting out a quiet sigh, the bed would let out a small creak as William sat his noiseless son. He'd turn his head over to look at him, seeing he had his face hidden in his arms. Careful as not to startle him, he'd talk to him in a hushed tone _"Do you want to tell me what happened?"_

No response. William scooted a little closer to him, soothingly rubbing his hand over his son's back as he asked, _"Was someone pickin' on you during school?"_

Silence hung over the room yet again. Right before William assumed he wasn't getting any answers, Matthew would finally let out a small _"Yes."_ Relieved he wasn't being ignored after all, William press further. _"Do you want to talk_ _about it?_ " He'd ask lightly, not wanting to force him to explain. Matthew remained soundless for a moment before quietly saying _"No."_ Sighing, William looked away for a moment to think. _"Well... once you're ready, I'd like to hear what_ _happened so I can tell your teacher._ " The school Matthew attended wasn't light when it came to troublesome students and bullying, so he was sure something would be done about it. Matthew slowly turned his head, peering at his father with reddened, watery eyes. William gazed back at him before patting the spot next to him. Matthew hesitantly rose up, scooting close to his father's side while William wrapped his arm around him. As a few more tears slid down his son's cheeks, William would hum an old but tranquil tune, hoping to distract him from whatever memories were following him:

_"Don't be a worry baby,_  
 _no need to hurry, baby,_  
 _when you're with me,_  
 _don't run way up ahead..."_

Matthew tilted his head with curiosity, not seeming to remember this song very well. William carried on anyway, hoping to revive some pleasant older memories than the newer ones at school.

_"...take the long way instead,_   
_there's lots to see_   
_when you slow down and listen,_   
_then you wont go a'missin'_   
_chances to play,"_

The man felt his son move a little closer to him, huffing out a quiet sigh while letting out the occasional sniffle. At the very least he did seem to be more relaxed. 

_"We'll always have tomorrow,_   
_no need to let it borrow time_   
_from today,_   
_so don't be a worry baby,_   
_no need to hurry baby,"_

William continued on with his voice carrying out harmoniously despite how tired he felt. While this was all running smoothly, he was completely unaware of the upcoming interruption building up in his nose.

_"When you're with me_   
_just take it easy-peasy,_   
_my little lemon sq-"_

A loud sneeze would erupt from William right before he could finish his song. _'Oh dear'_ William thought as felt Matthew flinch beneath him. _William had completely_ forgotten he was sick... he could only hope Matthew hadn't caught any of his germs. William would heave out a quiet groan while he heard a small giggle emerge from his son. His brow would arch in confusion as he'd look back at his son "What's so funny?" Matthew would only snicker again until he pointed to his face. _"You've got snot running down your nose!_ " No matter how wise his son was for his age, he was still a young boy. Young boys, of course, weren't the most mature. William would give out a smirk as he looked to Matthew's own nose. _"So do you, silly goose."_

_Hopefully his running nose had only been caused by his crying._

Right as his father pointed the snot out, Matthew's amusement vanished. _"Eww."_ He'd grumble, scanning his room for anything to wipe it off with. William would only shake his head, rising off of the bed & gesturing for Matthew to do the same. _"Come on now, let's go clean ourselves off- and if you're feeling cold then you can go sit by the fireplace."_ Matthew would nod & hop back to his feet, rubbing his eyes before approaching the partially opened door. Before he could exit his room & grab some tissues for the both of them, he heard William quietly call his name. He'd look back, mildly befuddled. What could he possibly want now?

_"Yeah?"'_

William would give him a small smile & lay his hand over his heart. Even if Matthew may not remember what this means, he'd never forget the promise they made.

_"You're always with me."_

* * *

**1/27/2010**

  
_I once felt as whimsical as a flower,_   
_scattering my seeds all across the meadow._

  
_My body is now growing weak, and my petals_   
_are beginning to wilt away._

  
_If you are ever to cry once I leave,_

_then have your tears land upon the many memories_ _I've sowed into the earth._

 _Your grief will water the seeds I've left especially for you_ _and once they grow, you will remember:_ _you're always with me._

  
Morning dew was sprinkled over the blades of grass that sprouted through the melting snow. The low humming of bees hung through the air as they collected pollen from the new growth of flowers scattered across the plain. Winter now reached its end and Spring was creeping in to take its place.

The sweet smell of flowers drifted against the tranquil breeze along with a cloudless sky that had rays of sunlight warming the earth below. People were moving about freely with their day, no longer having to worry about trudging through the thick snow. If there was anything left to be concerned over, it was allergies and inhaling pollen. 

This time of the year was William's absolute favorite. The sights, the smells, everything about it just brought him a sense of joy. He owned a garden of his own outside of his house and it thrived the most during this season. By now he would've had fresh berries to pick and some flowers he could decorate his home with. When he wasn't tending to his son's needs, he was usually doing his job as a florist selling off the flowers he grew. Although his shop was still small & definitely could use improvement, he had a handful of loyal customers that gave him a decent amount of coin. William was also fond of witnessing foliage growing over the once barren land, finding it to be a wondrous experience. From what once was a snow driven land was now a world full of beautiful wildlife and of course, flowers. What ruined all of this for William was that he wasn't able to experience any of Spring's wonders this year. 

Long since it'd been he had been confined anywhere else but his hospital bed. After receiving more _complications_ around the end of December, he had been transported back to the nearby hospital and had to stay until he fully recovered. Healing had been a slower process than he had wished, his current injuries being substantially worse than his last ones. One early morning he simply went off to retrieve some items at the local bookstore. Right as he finished climbing up some stairs, he found himself spacing out & twitching like mad. Admittedly this wasn't the first time he experienced this, but he believed it wouldn't happen again. He _wanted_ to believe it wouldn't happen again. Throughout his boggled mind he attempted to say something, _anything_ , but all he could make out were a few slurred noises. Before anyone had time to approach him, the drastic jerking of his limbs made him fall off the nearby stairs. This resulted in plenty of bruises and of course, a few broken bones. Although he lost consciousness before the pain took over, now he was able to feel all of the aches surrounding his bruised & beaten body. As much as he hated to be in all this agony, he had to admit it was a miracle that he survived at all. It was a relief to him that his heart was still beating. 

He couldn't bear the thought of how his family was feeling right now. Howard had already been worrying over him the moment he'd first been sent to the hospital. His son Matthew- the poor boy- probably didn't fully understand a thing that was going on. Part of William hoped things would stay that way. All he had wanted to do was gather some books for himself and his husband. Yet here he was now, glued to a hospital bed with nothing to do. All that he _was_ able to do is ponder on what his life was coming to. Never has he ever felt so paranoid. Any moment he could try going somewhere and have his entire body act against him. How could he possibly leave his house again knowing that he might land back into the emergency room? 

Briefly he'd pull out his good arm to rub the beads of sweat drizzling down his face. Goodness, he really needed to stop thinking such unpleasant things. Before him splayed his other arm, whose bone had been the one to get broken during the fall. It was   
wrapped in a splint along with his left leg having a cast & laying limply against the bed. His rib had also been fractured, making simply breathing in & out painful. Fortunately it was healing quicker than the other harmed bones, but it still bothered him nonetheless. A nurse had been kind enough to lend him an ice pack to lay against it, a momentary distraction from the pain it emitted. Aside from his injuries & unusually grim thoughts, there was one thing William was looking forward to: today his husband & son were coming over to visit him. A nurse should hopefully come lead them to him soon, since they obviously didn't know their way throughout the massive building. It was both a pleasure and a pain for him to be able to communicate with his family again. The last thing he wanted was for Matthew to witness his current state. He was worried about Howard too of course, but his mind wasn't nearly as fragile as their seven year old son's. Yet at the same time, the selfish part of him yearned to see his family again. It really hadn't been that long since he last saw them, it was nearing the end of January, and he'd only been in the hospital just before Christmas. That meant absolutely nothing to William, though. He felt horrid for having to spend any time away from his family at all. Thinking of that also made guilt gnaw at the man once more: he had completely missed out on his son's favorite winter holiday. He could only hope Howard's presence and the gifts he left behind was enough of a distraction for his absence. 

Footsteps echoed from the outside of his room, causing William to return to the present world. His eyes drifted to where his door was, hopefully waiting for his long waited guests to arrive. His heart thudded in a mixture of excitement and anxiousness as he heard the loud 'creak' of his door opening. There stepped in one of his most trusted nurses, Mrs. Anthea. Out of all of the nurses in the building, she was the most understanding out of all of them. Mrs. Anthea herself experienced similar things to what he had now in the past, so the two managed to bond over it. She also held an odd resemblance to his grandma which brought back memories of his youth. He wasn't quite sure how old she was, but her age never managed to hinder her work. The kind lady would turn & gesture for the guests outside to step in. _"Hes been waiting for you."_ She said with a smile as Howard slowly wandered in. In his palms was a transparent vase with lovely boutique of various flowers, one which he noticed consisted of his most favorite ones. Howard's dark brown eyes would land onto him, his expression unreadable as he inspected his injured body. William would mask his anxiety with a weak smile which Howard eventually returned. He wasn't sure whether Howard was faking too or not. He'd set the vase full of flowers aside & lean in to give him a small kiss on the forehead. A genuine smile took over William as he gazed fondly at the taller man. _"I've missed you."_ He said quietly as Howard pulled away. William tilted his head to the nearby boutique, his smile never wavering _"Thank you for the flowers, they're absolutely beautiful."_ For once his dull room had a dash of color and the sweet scent of the petals drifted through the air. The attention from the flowers shifted over to the smaller footsteps entering the room as Matthew's head poked through the door. 

Never in his life had he been inside of a hospital before, so it was obvious the young boy was going to be curious. Matthew examined the room with wide, searching eyes as he stared over at the odd machinery. While William felt relieved his son wasn't overwhelmed by it all, he felt bad that he had to go to a hospital at all. He wasn't even ten years old but he had to deal with all of this. His waves of guilt would be overcome with joy as Matthew went over to him excitedly. _"Hi papa!"_ Matthew exclaimed as he stood next to Howard with paper kept firmly in his grasp. _"Hey there buttercup."_ William tried to keep his smile while greeting his son. He wished they didn't have to meet each other this way. Ignoring the guilt still bubbling inside him, his gaze trailed down to the paper still clutched in his hand _"Whatcha got there, kiddo?"_ Matthew would pipe up immediately at the question & proceed to shove the paper right into William's face. _"I made a drawing of us!"_ William blinked, leaning back so he could get a proper look at Matthew's artwork. Before him was a drawing used from what he assumed was Matthew's leftover crayons. Three jolly stick figures were standing upon a grassy meadow, holding each other's hands. The sun was on the very corner of the paper with the blue sky scribbled in the background. In the middle was the smallest figure, which he guessed was Matthew. The surrounding ones were him & his husband, along with a few words being displayed at the top: _'Get well soon papa!'_

William stared at the paper for what felt like an eternity, unable to tear his attention away. The threat of tears pricking at his eyes would fade as he realized Matthew was waiting for him to speak.. _"It's lovely, Matthew-"_ He'd murmur, gently putting the artwork aside _"thank you."_ Mrs. Anthea still stood by the door, keeping quiet so the three spoke without interruption. Her eyes were squinted up at the nearby clock as she inspected the current time. _"Alright,"_ She finally spoke up, casting her gaze back to the trio _"unfortunately you can't stay for too long, William will need to take his medication soon."_ Howard would look over to her with a frown, but he had the sense to not complain. _"You can stay for about_ _fifteen minutes, but nothing more."_ She'd nod to the family before stepping to the door. _"Before I leave,"_ Mrs. Anthea added, looking to William's bed _"there's a button on the rails of the bed that'll alert other nurses if there's an emergency."_ Howard nodded slowly, but Matthew was beginning to look rather nervous. _"Nothing bad will happen, right?"_ Matthew questioned while fiddling nervously with his hands. _"I doubt it, sweetheart"_ The nurse passed him a comforting smile _"but you never know what will happen, so be sure to remember where that button is."_ His son would let out a small nod, relaxing slightly at the lady's words. Mrs. Anthea gave a small wave before opening the door, _"I'll be off now- you_ _three remember to have a good time."_ His husband briefly waved goodbye before turning back to William, locking their gazes together. Distress was darkened over Howard's eyes and his brows were furrowed ever so slightly. William could tell he was trying his best not to express his worries in front of their son. Something he appreciated very much since he'd rather not have Matthew get anxious as well. 

Howard would make an unusual move by opening his mouth to speak, but unfortunately was cut off by their son. _"What's that stuff on your arm and leg for?"_ Curiously he'd point at the object curled around his broken limb. William bit back a tired sigh and began explaining; _"The bones in my arm and leg are broken, so I need ta' wear those to help protect em' and keep the bones in place."_ Matthew's eyes were the size of moons by the time he finished his explanation. _"Your bones are broken?"_ He'd echo in dismay. William was quick to respond, not wanting his son's emotions to get the better of him _"Well, yes- but they'll heal over time."_ Hopefully that'd be enough to cool him down. Matthew tipped his head to the side, more confused than troubled _"Why cant you just glue them back together?"_ William couldn't help but let out an amused snort _"If things were that easy then by now I would already be back home."_ Briefly he cast a glance over to Howard, whom also seemed to brighten up at their son's silliness. Matthew stayed quiet for a moment before piping up again "Would tape work instead?" William found himself unable to hold back a gentle fit of laughter, his husband even giving out the occasional chuckle or two. William's laughter would come to an abrupt end as pain suddenly pierced him in the chest. The man would grow quiet, heaving out a pained breath while holding his palm over where his chest was. Howard froze as he soon as he noticed his husband's discomfort. In a flash he was already back by his side, inspecting him thoroughly to ensure he wasn't in any danger. Matthew remained silent while watching the two before quickly nudging Howard's arm. _"Is papa okay?"_ Their son would ask shyly.

Gathering up his strength, William dragged his good hand off his chest to pat Matthew on the head _"I'm fine buttercup, no need ta' worry."_ Howard was staring down at the button, not appearing to be very convinced. _"My ribs were fractured from the fall as well,"_ William cut in before his husband did anything outlandish, _"which means my chest can hurt from time ta' time."_ Matthew looked over to him as he finished, something in his eye indicating he was up to something. His gut instinct turned out correct as his son then dug through his pants' pockets & pulled out... a small box of band aids. Howard was quick to notice it as well, his deep and solicitous voice unexpectedly rumbling from his throat _"I thought I_ _told you to keep those back at home, sonny."_ he sounded rather displeased. William couldn't help but warm up slightly as Howard's voice filled his ears. He forgot how much he missed listening to his voice. Meanwhile Matthew ignored his father's discontentment as he'd pull out one of the bandages inside the box _"You did, but I knew they'd come in handy later."_ Matthew replied while tearing off the plastic surrounding the band aid. Howard would arch a brow at his words _"How so?"_ Matthew threw the plastic aside (which only peeved Howard further) and held a rainbow colored band aid in front of William with a grin _"It can help him feel better!"_ William peered down at the bandage presented to him, unsure how to react. After a small pause he'd begrudgingly say _"...I suppose it wouldn't hurt to try it on."_ Matthew's smile would only broaden as William carefully took the band aid & placed it over his chest. Howard watched them without saying a word, but William guessed that at this rate he was more amused than irritated. Silently he'd also pray the nurses who would check on him later didn't question his colorful new accessory. 

A few minutes passed since then, the three had managed to share a couple of laughs & catch up with one anothers current doings. Even though William was having the most exciting day he had in quite some time he knew that the clock was ticking. His attention flickered every so often to check the number the clock was pointed to, dreading the moment his relatives had to leave. Knowing he'd be alone in his room once more made the flower of joy sprouting inside him shrivel away. Sure, he always had the nurses to talk to when they checked on hm- but they'd never be enough to replace his beloved Howard and Matthew. 

Shaking his head, William cleared his troubled mind to continue his ongoing conversation. _"So winter break will be ending soon,"_ He'd remind his son whom was standing close by _"are you looking forward to meeting your friends back at school?"_ The small boy had managed to gain some of his classmate's interests, and thankfully it seemed he wouldn't be alone anymore. He could only hope this meant his grades would begin climbing back to the A's once more. Matthew was nodding eagerly at this,smiling at the mere thought at reuniting with his close students _"Uh-huh! Travis also said he was gonna help me catch up with stuff I missed during class."_ William smiled faintly at that. Most of the kids in Matthew's class were... far from pleasant, but there were a few golden nuggets to be found every now and then- Travis being one of them. Discussions of school aside, his attention would be averted to the sound of the doorknob being twisted. The man could've sworn he felt his heart stop the moment he witnessed the door open. Howard would pull away from his side to come approach Mrs. Anthea, seeming to have something on his mind as he spoke to her in a hushed tone. Matthew watched them for a moment before looking back at William, a small frown taking over his face. _"I guess we've gotta go now, huh?"_ He'd mumble, kicking his leg against the plain white floor. Indeed, this would be the last time he'd get to see them in a while. William felt his vision grow blurry with tears as he found himself unable to respond. All he wanted at this rate was to be back home, safe and sound with his family. If seizures weren't able to claim his life first, then depression from his isolation would certainly do the job for it. 

_"Papa?"_ Matthew's upset voice snapped him out of his thoughts. Quickly William cleared his throat, turning his face slightly so Matthew wouldn't see the tear escaping his eye. _"What is it, buttercup? Sorry, I spaced out for a moment."_ His tone fairly strained as he did his best to mask his current feelings. Matthew, although very young, was still able to tell his father was in need of consolation. William heaved out an uneasy sigh, unsure why his son was so quiet until he felt his small hand land upon his chest. Blinking with surprise, he'd glance over at Matthew, only to be startled by the fact he was already staring at him. _"Do you not remember?"_ Matthew would question him ambiguously. William opened his mouth a few times, his voice failing him. Fortunately there was no need to for him to answer, Matthew doing it for him anyway _"You said I'd always be right here, in your heart."_ William stared at him for a moment, slightly bewildered Matthew managed to recall him saying that. " _You'll never have to feel lonely because I'm still here, even if I'm not standing next to you."_ William was still partially taken aback from all this, but he'd eventually let out a small nod. _"Of course."_ He'd mumble, ashamed at himself for ever forgetting. His misery had left him blinded and unable to find happiness in his desolate hospital room. All the time he'd been there he couldn't stop thinking about how lonely he was, how he wished to wrap his arms around his family & keep them in an endless hug. Now with his son's words ringing in his ears, he realized; he was never truly alone. As long as they both stayed in each others hearts, then all would be well between them. _"Will you remember that I'm always in your heart too, Matthew?"_

Their conversation would get interrupted as Howard quietly called for Matthew to come over. Knowing his remaining time was dwindling by the second, Matthew quickly looked back to his father & gave his final answer:

_"You're always with me."_

* * *

**7/13/2019**

  
_I now sit in a quiet meadow,_

_waiting for our seeds to grow_

  
_for I am now alone and preparing_

_for the day we meet again._

Angry storm clouds rolled overhead, lightning striking against the rainy skies, Lightning lining the sky would cast a blinding white light against the gloomy clouds. The summer sun had been blocked away from the misty clouds blanketing the sky, its warmth being drained away from the land. Rain poured heavily down to the streets below, covering the pavement with endless streams of water. The neighborhood was completely desolate, folk having already retreated to their homes before their bodies were soaked by the never ending rain. One of these people in particular would be huddled up in his room, clinging anxiously onto his knees as he waited for the storm to disappear.

Inside of a cramped and dimly lit room sat Matthew, a young teen whom was at the age of fifteen. He was hunched over his bed with his eyes shifting nervously to his window. Every now and then light would come flickering through the glass, which brought him nervously preparing for the next loud _boom_ of thunder. Not at all was he fond of the noise- if anything, he was absolutely terrified of it. He wasn't quite sure where his fear of thunderstorms came from, but most of it certainly originated from his hatred of loud noises and bright lights. That and this storm had taken him by surprise. Mere hours ago the sun had been shining gracefully from above, only now to be shielded away by thick grey clouds. Matthew felt a shiver crawl up his spine as the sudden cry of thunder reached his ears. He'd wrap his arms tighter around his knees, holding his trembling limbs close as he tried to separate his mind from the current weather. He wasn't the only one in the house at the moment. His father Howard was probably somewhere in his room in preparation for picking up his things. The house they'd been living in for years on end wouldn't be theirs for much longer. Howard had been struggling the last few years to pay rent & muster the energy to care for the house. Matthew too had struggled to even rise out of bed to do his chores & look over the building's well being. It took a while for Howard to eventually decide on moving elsewhere- this house filled with nothing but memories of good times they used to have. Good times which they'd never get to experience again, their spirits too drained and having a very important part of them gone from their lives.

This important part in particular would be William, whom passed away a few years prior from now. 

His death shook the small family to their core. They all had come to a conclusion that William was healthy again, which they believed firmly since of his swift hospital recovery. That was until one day in Febuary he had decided to pick up some gifts for his husband for Valentines day. Matthew wasn't aware of the full story, having been too busy shedding tears to properly hear to how his father died. From what he did remember he was walking across the road, gifts in hand until he suddenly fell on the ground head first. His skull broke from the impact and his brain likely had been damaged alongside it. Before anyone had the chance to hop out of their car and check on him... Matthew tried to force down the bile forming in his throat. Another car sped past, the owner driving it being completely boozed over. Their drunken driving resulted in them speeding right over William's twitching body, crushing him into a bloody pulp. Thank god he had never been there to witness his corpse. According to his neighbors it was a vile & gory mess. Many avoided that particular street for months after obtaining the news of what occurred there. Howard was torn up by the time he received the news of his husband's passing. He blamed himself repeatedly for his death, wishing over and over that he could've just asked to spend some time with William at home. It took him a while to even accept the fact William was gone. Matthew noticed him looking around the room every now and then, confused as to why William wasn't there with him. Matthew too may of done this a few times himself, perhaps even called out his name a few times. Of course he'd only be met with silence. William's cheery voice was sapped away from their lives forever, giving the house an oddly empty feeling as silence stretched throughout the entire building. It almost felt haunted now, both Matthew and his father being shells of their former selves. Matthew could've sworn he scented hints of alcohol drifting from his father's breath. It wasn't often, but it was often enough for him to know he was visiting the bar more than he used to. Matthew himself felt like he was just as alive as William, not having the strength nor mind to do anything anymore.

With William's death announced to the family, Howard did his best to recollect himself and later attempted getting his son into therapy. Foolishly Matthew had refused to get into it. At the time he claimed he didn't need the help, saying he was strong enough to deal with his grief by his almost adult self. Those words certainly didn't hold up today considering how deep in the dumps he was. Sometimes Howard had to come visit him just so he could remind him to brush his teeth and bathe himself. With his current mental state his friends there have been ditching him, his grades also plummeting to the ground. Thankfully summer arrived a few months ago, so he didn't need to worry about dealing with more failed tests and homework his teacher handed to him. Autumn was still on the horizon, so Matthew would just sleep through the rest of summer and wonder if his next year wouldn't be as rough as the last. There were genuine moments where Matthew _did try_ to catch up on his school work and start anew. Yet whenever he had finally gathered some motivation, misery would always come forward to drag him back down. It was a heartless cycle that he wasn't sure would ever come to an end. _So why should he even bother anymore?_

Matthew's relationship with his remaining father was also growing very strained. Only three days ago was Matthew escorted back home by the police. After months of consideration he had finally decided he wanted to run away. With Howard distracted with finding a new house he'd escape the building, not wanting to be another burden on his shoulders. Successfully he avoided being found for almost a week, preparing to make his way over to the distant cliffs. Much to his misfortune the cops were much faster than he was, thus leaving him where he was now. Howard grounded him the moment they got inside, obviously paranoid of him attempting to escape back into the wilderness. Not that Matthew really cared enough to run away at this point. All he wanted to do was lay in bed and isolate himself from reality. Howard had desperately tried communicating with him now that he was back home, but now Matthew usually kept him locked out so he could be by his lonesome. At this point all he wanted was to be alone. That and he didn't want to stress Howard even further with his nonsense. Hadn't the man gone through enough, after all? Matthew was ashamed at himself for ever  
causing him so much additional stress and trouble. Perhaps it would've been better if he had been put in William's place instead.

Lightning would suddenly crack outside of Matthew's window, causing him to flinch immediately. His head snapped over to where his window was, his eyes wide with panic. It was a miracle that hadn't struck the roof, otherwise he would've been nothing but a corpse by now. Terror now running wildly across his veins, the boy clutched tightly onto his bed sheets, finding it difficult to breath through his rising panic. In between his troubled thoughts the storm still raged on and showed no signs of stopping. Matthew took a moment to breathe in and out, his heart jolting in his chest as more thunder rumbled overhead. How was he supposed to act tranquil during this chaotic weather? Matthew began slowly rocking himself as he thought of what to do. Usually he had a stress toy close by, but with his room in such a poor state he doubted he'd be able to find it. His earbuds also stopped working so he couldn't blast any music into his eardrums. The internet was also barely functioning due to the outrageous storm going on outside. Matthew heaved out a shaky sigh, hiding his head in his knees as he thought harder with the little brain cells he had left. What could be possibly do that would at the very least distract him? He had absolutely nothing left for him except for his clothes lazily strewn around the place. 

If he wasn't able to comfort himself, then what would William do in this situation? Matthew slowly removed his face out of his legs, thinking some more. Old lyrics of a forgotten melody hung at the back of his head which he slowly began to pull out. During his younger years William had hummed something to him whenever he was in distress. Matthew recalled it always working on him, his tears drying as soon as his father sang to him. Even though William wasn't here to sing to it now, it wouldn't hurt to try repeating what he once did with him. 

After doing his best to recognize the lyrics through his head, Matthew block out the sound of the rain pattering outside to focus. He'd proceed let out a quiet inhale and quietly began singing, his voice rising over the storm outside:

_"Don't be a worry baby,_   
_no- no need to hurry, baby,_   
_when you're w-with me,_   
_don't run way up ahead..."_

He'd struggle to keep his voice smooth as he imagined William singing along with him, tears now threatening to form in his eyes. The boy started rocking himself again, hoping it'd be enough to fight back his tears. 

_"...take the l-long way instead,_  
 _there's lots to see_  
 _when you slow down and listen,_  
 _then you wont leave a...?"_

Matthew's singing came to an abrupt stop, his mind suddenly losing track of what the rest of the lyrics were. His bottom lip quivered slightly as he did his damned best to remember. Not only was he failing at everything else in life, now he couldn't even recall the rest of a simple song's words. Was he not able to do anything right anymore? Matthew's vision blurred as tears began pouring out like a waterfall. William would certainly be disappointed to see what his son has become. Right as he was about to sink back into a crying mess, a familiar male voice would suddenly emerge from his door. Matthew turned his head, his eyes widening as he realized who was standing before him. 

_"When you slow down and listen,_   
_then you wont go a'missin_   
_chances to play..."_

Howard's melodic voice carried across the room & pleasantly drifted into Matthew's ears. As lovely as his singing was, Matthew's attention kept flickering between him and the door. The storm had gotten him so startled that he forgot to lock it earlier. Howard must've heard his voice drifting out of his room, Matthew also noticed as he tried hiding his tears with a quick wipe of his hand. Unfortunately for him, Howard had been quick to notice the liquid trickling down his cheeks. He took a small step forward, not wanting to startle him while continuing his tune:

_"We'll always have tomorrow,_   
_no need to let it borrow time_   
_from today..."_

Matthew watched cautiously as Howard slowly strode through the room, unable to hold back the tears anymore. He hid his face back in his knees, not wanting to express his sadness as Howard leaned down in front of him with worried eyes.Matthew vaguely felt his father's hand rub his shoulder as he shakily began singing alongside him:

_**"...so don't be a worry baby,"** _   
_**no need to hurry baby."** _

The world around them seemed to disappear slightly as the two harmonized together, clouding out the cracking of lightning that still rang through the air.

**_"When you're with me_ **   
**_just take it easy-peasy,"_ **

A few hiccups emerged from Matthew as his sobbing thickened over his words. The bed beneath him would let out a faint creak as Howard sat beside him. Feeling him close by him, Matthew slowly lifted his head from his knees. Howard was looking at him with his arms spread out, inviting him into a hug. Matthew paused, hesitantly meeting eyes with him before slowly getting pulled into his embrace. More weeping would get muffled as Matthew hid his face in his chest, likely staining his shirt with tears and snot. However, dirty clothes were the least of Howard's concerns. With a spare hand he began rubbing his son's back in a circle formation before quietly uttering the last lyrics:

_"my little lemon squeezy,_  
 _you're always with me."_

Matthew noticeably stiffened by the time he finished the song. He had also gone completely silent, not even a singular sniffle coming from him. Howard tilted his head to look down at him, wondering if he did something wrong.

_"But do you promise?"_

Howard brushed a hand over his son's tangled hair as he murmured back to him, "Promise what, sonny?" Matthew lifted his head to look back at him, the faint light drifting in the room reflecting off of the tears silently falling down his face. "Do you promise you won't leave me too?" He'd splutter between tears, clearly referencing to his deceased husband. Howard was quiet for a moment, holding back a sob of his own as he pulled Matthew into a tighter hug. 

_"Yes, Matthew."_ Howard would rumble, forcing down his tears. He'd have to stay strong for both William and his son. _"For the rest of my days I will be with you, forever and always."_

Howard stayed quiet for a moment, hoping his words had been reassuring enough to his son. Unexpectedly Matthew would then scoot out of his embrace only to reach out his own arm and place his palm over Howard's heart. With a weak smile, he'd look up at his father and murmur: _"We'll both always be with you too."_

It took a moment for Howard's tired self to realize who this other person was, a small smile now spreading across his face. Matthew wouldn't have any time to do anything else as Howard reached out, pulling him into another hug. The pair were so distracted that they hadn't realized how quiet their surroundings had gotten. The rumbling of thunder and flashing of lightning had come to a stop. The rain outside had come to a light trickle as sunlight began pouring through the window and fill the room with a pleasant warm glow. Howard admired the view for a moment before looking down at his son with a smile.

Back when Matthew was still in the womb, Howard made a promise to himself and William that'd he care for him no matter the circumstances. Nothing would ever stop him from cherishing his baby boy's life, even when it's time for him to lead his own path. When the time comes that his body grows weak and hairs turn as white as snow, he'd always remind himself and his son of this:

_"You're always with me."_


End file.
